An organization called FRIEDA, located at 320 Walnut Street, bills itself as “connecting generations to strengthen our community.”
This membership-based group of individuals get together to listen to invited speakers, participate in panel discussions and engage in workshops with many different themes. The versatility of topics is impressive. The group combines these lectures and events with afternoon teas, breakfasts and dinners. Guests may attend events, which leads to my story.
I was invited to attend a Frieda-sponsored talk by Father Paul Morrissey, cofounder of the Philadelphia chapter of Dignity, an LGBTQ ministry in the Catholic Church. Fr. Morrissey is also involved with Communication Ministry (CMI), a newsletter and retreat ministry for LGBTQ priests, brothers, and sisters. The invite noted that Fr. Morrissey will offer his views on what it is like to be a “gay priest” and in so doing will describe his feelings “of imprisonment in his identity as a gay priest.”
In the late 1970s and early ‘80s I was an occasional member of Dignity Philadelphia but left the group because the Masses being offered there were filled with liturgical innovations. Guitars replaced traditional hymns or chants, and sometimes the wording of the Mass was changed to reflect early notions of equity and diversity.
The audience for Fr. Morrissey’s talk was mainly non-Catholic. There were a couple people from his Philadelphia parish and a small number of LGBTQ Catholics, most likely Dignity members. Overall, I liked Fr. Morrissey’s humility. He read passages from his novel, The Black Wall of Silence, billed as “an in-depth look at the inner life and pressures faced by priests and bishops.” Fr. Morrissey is also the author of a memoir, Let Someone Hold You: The Journey of a Hospice Priest.
He talked about growing up in a large Irish Catholic family, when he was one of fourteen children. At 86, he has no trouble articulating his thoughts and communicating to an audience, but so many things were left unsaid. What does it mean to be a gay priest? This was answered only partially when Fr. Morrissey talked about falling in love with a younger priest at one time, implying that the relationship was consummated but the double life involved in such an arrangement proved too much for Morrissey’s partner who left the priesthood to become fully who he was, a gay man and not a celibate. Fr. Morrissey then realized he loved the Church too much and had no place to go and remained where he was, an active priest serving the Church, although he stated that he’s been celibate ever since that affair.
There are scores of celibate gay priests. Indeed, probably a great many Catholic priests have a gay orientation. Many keep their vows of celibacy, but are still gay in orientation and “spirit.” I’ve met many gay priests over the years, most of them non-celibate who are pastors of big Philadelphia parishes and who hang out with their priest friends in gay bars (not wearing Roman collars, of course).
By the end of the evening, I was left with many unanswered questions.
While I genuinely liked this man, what message exactly was he sending to gay Catholics despite his claim that he was celibate? Was it that homosexuality, no matter how it is expressed, is not a sin? Was it that only sexual promiscuity was a sin but falling love and acting on that love in a sexual way was not a sin? He didn’t address any of these things. And what was his message to other albeit younger gay priests serving the Church? Was he suggesting ignoring the Church’s teaching if and when they fell in love (or lust) with some hot guy?
What about the priestly vows of celibacy? Do those vows only apply to heterosexual priests?
The audience, I’m afraid, didn’t know much about Catholic doctrine or theology. That’s why none of these questions were asked during the Q and A, although I did ask Fr. Morrissey what his thoughts were on Courage International, the LGBT Catholic group that encourages gay Catholics to adhere to Church teaching and attempt to live a celibate life. Fr. Morrissey answered that question without condemning Courage, even stating that it was a viable option for Catholics who held such beliefs. Ironically, he then added he hoped there would be more questions from the audience because he wouldn’t want to end on that note.
One LGBTQ activist in the room told Fr. Morrissey that he didn’t leave the Church, “but the Church left him,” presumably because of its teaching on homosexuality. “If the Church won’t change, I’m leaving! It has nothing to offer in any other area!” That’s the attitude of many misguided activists. For his part, Fr. Morrissey mentioned the value of staying in the Church if only to have access to the Eucharist.
A friend of mine who accompanied me to the talk suggested that the theme of the night — whether or not the Catholic Church will change its doctrine on homosexuality – wasn't answered. Based on his comments that he is celibate, was he saying that gay Catholics should be celibate or sexually active? Points like this should have been clarified, and probably would have been had he spoken to a doctrinally literate Catholic audience.
But when someone comes up with the cliché, "The Church left you" it is clear that the speaker has no understanding at all of Catholicism.
One comment that caught my attention was when Fr. Morrissey asked himself, "Where can I go if I leave?"
Quite a few older gay priests are in the same boat: they have nowhere else to go [outside of the Church], so they go through the motions. The priesthood becomes just a job for them. Although Fr. Morrissey seems way above that because during his talk one saw that his faith was genuine, yet as the friend I was with commented, he did reveal a bit of weakness when he revealed that.
